Love and obsession: They might seem similar, but healthy love is all about respect, trust, and supporting each other’s growth. Obsession, on the other hand, involves controlling behaviors, constant thoughts, and relying too much on the other person.
So, am I obsessed? This quiz is designed to help you figure out the nature of your feelings in a relationship. It’s not a diagnosis, but it can be a starting point for thinking about your own behavior.
If you have concerns after taking the quiz, it is always a good idea to consult with a qualified mental health professional.
What is Obsessive Love Disorder (OLD)?
If you’re worried you might be obsessed with a person, you may have heard of Obsessive Love Disorder, or OLD.
It’s important to note that OLD isn’t a formal mental health diagnosis. It’s just a term people use to describe obsessive thoughts and behaviors that sometimes occur in relationships. People experiencing OLD often display possessiveness, extreme jealousy, and a general obsession with their partner.
Sometimes, OLD is also linked to concepts like erotomania (a delusional belief that someone is in love with you) or codependency (an unhealthy reliance on another person for your emotional well-being).
Attachment styles, such as disorganized emotional development (DED) or reactive attachment disorder (RAD), and personality disorders, such as borderline personality disorder (BPD) or relationship obsessive-compulsive disorder (ROCD), can be contributing factors. These aren’t direct causes, but they can influence the development of unhealthy relationship patterns.
The “Am I Obsessed?” Quiz: How It Works
The “Am I Obsessed?” quiz, sometimes called the Love or Obsession Quiz, is designed to help you understand the difference between healthy affection and potentially unhealthy, obsessive behaviors in a relationship. It’s not meant to diagnose anything; it’s just a tool for self-reflection.
The quiz will ask you questions about things like:
- the intensity of your emotions
- how dependent you are on your partner
- whether you struggle with control issues
Remember, the quiz is a self-report questionnaire, which means your results are based on your own perceptions. Use it as a jumping-off point for further thought, not as a definitive answer about your relationship.
What does this “Am I Obsessed?” quiz look for?
The “Am I Obsessed?” quiz analyzes certain behaviors, feelings, and relationship dynamics. If you answer “yes” to many of the questions, the quiz results may indicate that you have some unhealthy obsessions.
Codependency
Codependency is an unhealthy relationship pattern in which one person depends on the other to meet their needs. A person who is codependent may enable a loved one’s bad habits or addictions, and/or they may struggle to function in a healthy way without their loved one.
Controlling behaviors and possessiveness
Obsession can cause stress, anxiety, and conflict in relationships. Over time, it can even lead to the end of a relationship. Controlling behaviors and possessiveness are two key signs that you may be more obsessed with someone than in love with them.
Jealousy and extreme neediness
If you are always worried about your partner leaving you, or if you constantly need reassurance that they love you, you may have an unhealthy attachment. Excessive jealousy and extreme neediness can also be signs of an obsessive mindset.
Understanding the Stages of Obsessive Love
Dr. John D. Moore describes obsessive love disorder (OLD) as progressing through four stages: attraction, anxiety, obsession, and destruction.
The initial attraction feels intoxicating, but it quickly turns to anxiety as the person experiencing OLD begins to fear losing the object of their affection. This fear fuels obsessive thoughts and behaviors, which, if left unchecked, can lead to destructive actions that harm both individuals involved.
Understanding these stages can be incredibly helpful. Recognizing that your feelings are escalating beyond healthy attraction is the first step in taking control and addressing potentially harmful behaviors.
Who Should Take the Quiz and What to Do with the Results
Are you in a relationship and experiencing intense emotions? Do you wonder if your behavior is normal? This quiz is for you.
Anyone in a romantic relationship who wants to better understand their feelings and whether those feelings are healthy can benefit from taking this quiz.
However, if the quiz indicates you might be experiencing Obsessive Love Disorder (OLD), please seek professional help. A mental health professional can give you a diagnosis and recommend a course of treatment.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I have obsessive love disorder?
Obsessive Love Disorder (OLD) isn’t a formally recognized mental health diagnosis, but it describes a pattern of behavior where someone becomes intensely preoccupied with another person, often a romantic interest. Symptoms might include excessive thoughts about the person, attempts to control them, extreme jealousy, and difficulty accepting rejection. If these behaviors are causing significant distress or impacting your life, it’s important to consult a mental health professional. They can assess your symptoms and determine if you meet the criteria for a related disorder, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder or attachment disorder.
Am I obsessed, or is it just a crush?
Crushes are common and usually involve positive feelings, excitement, and idealization of the other person. Obsession, on the other hand, goes beyond these normal feelings. It becomes all-consuming, causing distress and anxiety when you’re not with or thinking about the person. Obsession might also involve intrusive thoughts, a need to control the situation, and ignoring the person’s boundaries or feelings.
How do you know if you’re obsessed?
Signs of obsession can include: constantly thinking about the person, feeling anxious or distressed when you’re not with them or can’t contact them, checking their social media excessively, feeling jealous or possessive, trying to control their behavior, neglecting your own responsibilities or relationships, and struggling to accept rejection. If these behaviors are impacting your daily life and causing you distress, it’s important to seek professional help. A therapist can help you understand your feelings and develop healthier coping mechanisms.
Final Thoughts
Being self-aware is a big deal, and it’s the first step in addressing obsessive behaviors. If you’re concerned about the results of the quiz, reaching out for professional help can be invaluable.
There are also some actionable steps you can take on your own, such as setting boundaries, focusing on personal growth, and building a strong support network outside of the relationship.
Remember, this quiz is a tool for self-discovery and not a clinical diagnosis. Use it as a starting point for further exploration and potential change.